A new hope

From the IFOCE website:

“There is an century-old prophesy within the competitive eating community, dismissed by most, that foretells the rise of the One Eater, a woman who will electrify America.s gurgitators and lead them to international victory once again. Like Joan of Arc before her, this eater will be slender of stature, but mighty in strength. In recent months, the prophesy has been mentioned more and more frequently as the eaters have watched Sonya Thomas excel in nearly every contest she enters.”

A bizarre subculture…long ago, as a seller of beef jerky and pickled goods, my boss Moose entered me into a pie eating competition. Of course, he didn’t tell me this and going about my business I had a coupla hot dogs for lunch. Disaster did not strike, but suffice it to say that my competitive eating career did not start with a bang, but instead fizzle in the face of more pie on my face than in my belly.